are over and I survived. Even got out of making New Years dinner I had planned. Glorious McDonalds. A rare treat these days. Suggested by the manchild. Planned bacon cheese dogs but after nap just wasn't feeling it. Slowly taking down the Christmas decor. There is not a lot.

My Sweet Sadie is in Kitty City hopefully to be adopted soon. She will be there for a month. She is so sweet I wouldn't be surprised if a foster adopted her.

My quitting smoking today has already failed. I made the mistake of letting brandon get out of here without taking the last of my tobacco and tubes. Totally forgot about the bag until I walked out of my bedroom this morning.

Been doing PT exercises from YouTube for my trapezius. It hurts bad today but I think it is because I have been working it. I did not know that for every two inches you lean your head forward it gains ten pounds. I am pretty sure this pain is from sitting in front of this computer for the last year. I am trying to correct it. Wish I could afford to have access to a pool or some hydrotherapy for exercise. Oh and some glorious massage therapy. Hopefully some myofascial release will help. I noticed yesterday that my back did not hurt as bad as usual but I don't know what I did differently. Only that I have been doing my homework exercises plus whatever I can find useful. I have developed a pain in my head that does not feel like my normal head ache or migraine and I have had it for about five or six days. I am hoping that it is from my back issues. I can't deal with something new. It is not severe, fluctuates from forgotten to about a five maybe a quick flash of eight then back down to about a five/six. I have had to only take something for it last night. Today it is more persistent. I just tolerate it. I have a primary visit with new doc will bring it up to her and pray she does something directly instead of prescribing something. Maybe if I continue the exercising it will get better. At least that is what I am telling myself lol.

I am a bit baffled, I discovered that about 75 people read my last blog. Seriously? Why on earth? I am happy when I get responses but I usually know those people through here at BT. Who the hell is reading? Are they repeat readers? do they come back for more babbling by a sick old white lady. Okay I don't feel old mentally. Physically I feel about ninety. I am sure someone is gonna get all up in their feelings because I wrote that I am white LOL, that slays me.

The titrating down on the Trintellix is going well. On Sunday I start every other day for two weeks then I see doc Mac a week and a half after my last dose and we discuss my titrating off of Latuda. He may balk. I'm not playin' lol. I will make sure that I get my proper sleep even if I have to keep those meds. I refuse to live without good sleep again. Maybe I can get more into the MMJ before bed and get off of those meds also. Good dosage medibles are incredible for a good deep sleep. That's eight bucks a pop though and while for the average person who is not an experienced user that is four doses but I have to eat the whole thing. 200 mg THC. Guaranteed 8 hours of sleep. No next day side effects. That is the only reason I eat a medible. I don't during the day for one because they make me tired and they do nothing for me otherwise. Just another medication that works differently for different people.

I have started visiting a new MMJ club that opened up in the location that my usual clubhouse use to be in. Very few people there yet, people are starting to come in more regularly as word spreads that they are open. I don't stay as long as I use to in the old one. I usually go for about an hour. It is still across town so gas wise it is a trip. Free coffee, pool, air hockey, ping pong, movies, music, lounging couches plus tables and chairs. I wish I didn't have to go alone.

All those exercises I have been freelancing have really done a number on my back. That's what I get for overdoing it. This is next day. I did make my bacon cheese dogs and they were the best I ever made. Jared ate most of them.

Jared...I am so worried about him. He needs to make some changes. He is almost 19 and is overweight, sleeps all day and gets up just before I take my nap. When I wake up it is almost dinner time and he is still in his room but with the door open so he can see me when I get up. Then we visit for a bit, he goes back to his room, lately with the door open, I feed the herd, make dinner while he is in and out of his room and we talk then we have dinner separately in our rooms and he is on puter while I watch a movie. Between nine and ten I go in and give him night time hug and love yous and see ya in the morning the same each night. Then I get to spend my little bit of time doing what I want to get ready for bed. I miss him. He can't/won't change his life if he doesn't know how and I am not a shining example right now. He is going to have to get a job. His encopresis is not better. We cut out the fast food and it flares up now if we eat it but I think something he eats makes it worse and I am beginning to suspect milk.

I must stop or I will be here all day.