How do you Keep Calm and Carrying On? Managing Worry

[Donna Thomson]

a new blog post: http://www.donnathomson.com/2012/08/...ns-at-bay.html

[Earth Mother 2 Angels]

((((((Donna))))))

Dancing is wonderful therapy and excellent exercise. Good for you!

When I was younger, and on my own with my boys, I danced too. In high school and college, I took modern dance classes. To keep myself fit and to release my stress, I created routines to favorite music and worked out every morning after my boys were on their buses to school and before I hit the freeway for work. It really worked well for me for many years.

Ye ol' arthritis is kicking my buns as I age, so no more floor moves, or kicks, or leaps por moi!

Now, I walk. Every morning, when I am able, I walk about 1-2 miles through our neighborhood. We have greenbelts, a park and a golf course nearby, so I have lovely views on my walks. I greet neighbors, pet their dogs, catch up on news, greet all the dogs in their backyards along my way, breathe in the air, notice all the flowers, trees, foilage, every bit of nature I drink in. I visit with all of the critters, stop and watch the golfers, and the ducks in the lake. It's wonderful.

For 3 months, I haven't been able to take my walk, due to Jon's health issues, and my own problems with pain and swelling in my feet. Now that Jon's feeling much better, and so are my feet, I'm hoping to get back out there. I miss my walks.

My walks are my time for meditation and prayer, as well as socializing and appreciating nature. It is the most peaceful time in my day, and I'm looking forward to returning to my walks.

Many years ago, I used crafts as a therapy for my stress. I made floral arrangements, unique candles, and jewelry, which I gave as gifts to friends and family. I just don't have the time or energy any longer. Candles require a lot of time and most of that time is standing on my feet. Jewelry requires better eyesight and more nimble fingers.

Jim crafted Native American flutes. He has a workshop filled with wood and unfinished flutes, waiting for him to return. No time.

We used to love to garden, but those days are gone now too.

When I bemoaned to Jim recently, "I'm old," he responded, "You're not old. You've just lived more in your years than most people your age. So you feel old. But you aren't old. Yet."

Of course, he is older than me, so naturally, he'd say that!

We all need something to call our own, something to distract us from the stress and worry, something healthy and good for us to strengthen us and build up our reserves.

I'm glad you dance, Donna!

Don't forget ~ you also write! Another tremendous outlet, at least in my experience.

Great topic, as usual, and I hope others will join in and share their coping tools.

Love & Light,

Rose

[Donna Thomson]

Dear Rose, What do you think about as you walk? I like to walk in my neighbourhood at night and look in peoples' windows and decide if I like their decorating! That's so fun especially with my daughter Natalie or my friend Brenda who lives next door. We used to have dogs (all died of old age) and Jim and I would have a good excuse to split up (one of us staying at home with Nick, of course) and one walking the dog in the evening. I am naturally curious so I would look in windows and make up stories about the people inside. So fun! Maybe someday you will get back to your candles and crafts and Jim to his flutes. Rose, you are not old. My Mum is 90 and she is not old. We are people who choose love and life so how can we be old? xoDonna

[Earth Mother 2 Angels]

((((((Donna))))))

If you could climb into my body and my mind, you would say you were old. Trust me. I am pretty worn out, and the stress of my life has taken its toll on me.

And, I would guess that other grieving mothers would agree with me that grieving for Michael has aged me considerably. That has been my biggest challenge in "holding it together." In 9 years, Jon has been hospitalized 6 times for weeks at a time, in the same hospital, in fact, just doors from the room, where Michael was. It's impossible for me not to relive those last few weeks with Michael every time we are there. That whittles away at me.

Life is different, when you go past 60. You're on the other side now, and you start thinking about your own health and mortality. You may still love rock and roll, but you can't boogie like you did 30 years ago. Young at heart doesn't always equal young in body. And my body has been stressed to the max in carrying and lifting my boys for many years, before I met Jim. And Jim's body is suffering from his many years of lifting steel on his shoulders as a scaffolder. It catches up with you eventually. And we're there.

When celebrities/artists, who are your age or of your generation, start dying in rapid succession, it also makes one stop and ponder. For several months now, that's been true for our generation. It's a bit alarming and eye-opening. That contributes to us feeling old.

It's not the years on the calendar, it's the years on the chassis that makes me feel old.

When I walk, I try to clear my mind and meditate. I pray continuously. I admire everything around me. I know most of my neighbors, so there's not much left to the imagination! I've lived here 36 years.

I truly love animals and miss our cat and dog, so I befriend every critter I encounter, including squirrels, rabbits, and ducks. I absolutely treasure those times with the critters, as much if not more than my visits with the neighbors.

As graduate students with no money, my former spouse and I used to go to the airport to watch incoming and outgoing passengers. We made up conversations and stories about where they were going and why. Drama and comedy. It was cheap entertainment. So, I totally get your fantasies about your neighbors and their decorating.

While writing this response, Jim and I decided to give Jon a bath. When Jon was up in bed and all shiny, watching the Stevie Wonder in concert DVD, "Higher Ground" came on. Jon and I sang along and danced.

Maybe I'm not as old as I feel ... We'll see tomorrow ...

Love & Light,

Rose

[andromeda31]

Hi!

I have to laugh...I do the same when I am driving at night. If a window's blinds are open, I am peeking inside as I go past! Always looking for new decorating ideas. I have lots of projects I want to do and not enough time. I am lucky to be able to do a lot of different things for stress relief. Caitlin goes to bed early so it's easy for me to get away or do stuff at night. Since quitting the gym when school let out, I went back to exercising at home at night (watching dvd's from the library while I walk on treadmill). It makes the time fly by. I also scrapbook at my friend's house sometimes on friday nights...mostly we talk but we do get a little bit done! And I am in a book club at the library which meets once a month. I am a night owl so that helps too! Nighttime is my time...kids are sleeping and I can 'breathe'. I also like my computer...always have! Here is a picture of me from the 80's...took a summer school computer programming class (ever the nerd I was! lol!)...not such a leap to the digital scrapbooking I do now on my laptop. Much easier to put the laptop in the car to go to my friend's house than lugging up all my paper & albums from the basement to go scrapping! Brian & I are good at 'tag team' parenting...he has his breaks for hunting/fishing and I get time for the things I listed above. It works out pretty well. :)

Lisa O.5th grade computer class.jpg

[Donna Thomson]

Lisa, you are ADORABLE!!!! Love the 80s hair as well. Too cute :) and I never thought of scrapbooking on the laptop. Interesting!

[Earth Mother 2 Angels]

((((((Lisa))))))

Great photo ~ you were a darling little nerd! Look at the size of that computer!!

Good for you taking time to exercise and scrapbook and visit with your girlfriends. And how great that you and Brian give each other free time. That's a partnership in action!

It's so important to our health and well being that we do things for ourselves. To keep us balanced. Sounds like you've got that worked out.

Love & Light,

Rose