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Thread: Help Required For A Child Going To School (4.5 Years)

  1. #1

    Default Help Required For A Child Going To School (4.5 Years)

    Dear All,

    I am writing to seek help from all the group members, my child is 4.5 years, he is going to a main stream school.

    He has been ruled out for Autism but positive for CAS (Childhood Aprexia of Speech) further its not clear as if he is ADHD or Not. As in Pakistan Doctors believe its hard to label before seven years. He also has low I.Q i.e. around 2 Years below his age group.

    Now the main problem is his school life, he has been going to school and this is his 3rd Year, he had to repeat his Nursery (Twice) and now he is in K.G 1.

    Till today he is crying in his school and he is very persistent, I do not blame the school infact i am very blessed to have his school as they are very caring and understanding for my Son they also keep on advising us ways to get out of this situation and I believe if my son was in some other school they would have not considered him for more then six months. I not only appreciate the management but also their staff to put up to this child for so long where he is the only exceptional case in the whole school.

    I & my wife feel very bad and guilty to make the school and other children go through this pain i.e. our child is not able to adjust in school and crying for more than 2 years and not only his class is getting disturbed but also all the teachers are getting disturbed plus in academic point of view is he not gaining anything. Comparing him to his class mates from scale of 1 to 10, I would place him at 1 or 2.

    Please suggest what to do?

    We are totally clueless, we have tried all things,
    * Psychological Evaluation (From 3 different places i am attaching the reports)
    * Bera Test
    * EEG Test
    * Blood Test etc.
    We have even tried all techniques such as counselling, explaining, positive reinforcements, negative reinforcement, story telling but simply nothing works to make him learn or stay quiet at school.

    First we used to go to one speech therapist then there was no result so we changed to second one & he is also going for occupational therapy, it has been almost 2 years now for his speech and there is very little improvement. Our Therapist says don't expect that early, it takes years for words to come. But he is wasting his precious school years.

    Please advice on following:

    1) Should we continue his main stream school or get him admission in special needs school?
    2) Should we consider remedial therapy? as per our knowledge he is too small (4.5 Years) for remedial therapy.
    3) How to make him stop crying in School and in-fact make him enjoy the school.
    4) Kindly suggest any good speech exercises for him.
    5) Should we consider Behavioral Therapy also as his school is complaining that he has started being physical with other children's, now we know that he is not being aggressive or hyper because since he has no speech when no one listens to him he starts using his hand to address the other individual. He doesnt knows that force he is using to address the other person plus he doesnt knows which body parts to hit or not for e.g he will hit in the eye or may be on the cheek etc. The school cant continue with this behavior.
    6) A new thing happened in the school, they informed us that he is very happy in the art class but when when comes in the class room he starts crying, plus when they handover the books he sees other children writing he starts crying, when he sees other children talking he starts crying, when he is asked to say one letter word he starts crying.

    We are very emotionally broken and mentally disturbed we require any help you can extend. I will be very helpful to this community.

    Awaiting for your positive response.

    Please find below link to the reports of the child.

  2. #2
    Distinguished Community Member Earth Mother 2 Angels's Avatar
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    ((((((sunny3000)))))) ~


    It appears that your son has received a fairly thorough assessment and testing. Unfortunately, I don't have time to read through all of the documents you attached. You state that Autism has been ruled out. Has Asperger's Syndrome also been ruled out?

    Perhaps your son's crying and aggressive behavior are expressions of his frustration in being unable to compete with the other children in his class. Although he is being included in the main stream environment, he feels excluded, because he can't do what the other children can do. Every child needs the opportunity to succeed at something.

    I suggest that you explore special needs programs and determine whether they provide an environment where your son can experience successes. Special needs programs are designed to address each child's specific needs. In the main stream setting, teachers and other professionals may not have the training or experience to provide the resources for students with special needs.

    You might try a special needs program for a year to see whether your son benefits and improves. If that doesn't occur, then you can return to the main stream program. It might be that a few years in a special education program will result in your son being able to return successfully to the main stream program.

    Hoping that you will find the perfect program for your son.

    Love & Light,


    Edited to Add: How is your son's behavior at home and in social settings outside of school? Have you considered teaching your son sign language to assist in his communication?
    Last edited by Earth Mother 2 Angels; 08-27-2016 at 12:40 PM.
    Mom to Jon, 49, and Michael, 32, who were born with an undiagnosed progressive neuromuscular disease and courageous spirits. Our Angel Michael received his wings in 2003. Our Angel Jon received his wings April 2019. April 2020, Jim, the world's most wonderful Dad, joined them. Now, they all watch over me.

  3. #3
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    Hi there, my first bit of advice for you is to get someone highly trained to diagnose anything like Autism or ADHD. In my country a lot of people who have been given the diagnosis of Autism do NOT actually have it. Have they found any physical reason for him not speaking? i.e brain damage,muscle control issues,sensory processing disorder,hearing problems? I have to wonder if he has some kind of sensory processing disorder which makes the school environment very intense and possibly physically painful to him. I also agree with Rose that he is probably more aware and is frustrated that he can't communicate like the other children do. When the school environment was deemed unsafe for me due to lack of accessibility when my family was forced to move I became a home schooler. All of my pervious academic issues in the regular school system disappeared and I became an honor student when I entered college because my needs were being individually met through home schooling. I found the transition from home schooling to college to be easy so maybe you could home school the child for a few years and then return him to mainstream. I also built an expansive social network as a home schooler by doing activities so I had many deep friendships that have lasted 12 or more years. For your child this could be an art class or some kind of body work class to help your child gain better breath control for speaking. There are also online public schools now like "K12" here if you wish for your child to still technically be in mainstream school without the issues like hitting etc. If your child does NOT cry at home the way he does in school I would strongly consider either a special education program,a traditional home schooling program or an online school program. I hope this helps. Also feel free to check out my films using the link in my signature. One of the films "Drama Sighted" deals with mainstream school issues.
    Last edited by funnylegs4; 08-28-2016 at 07:46 AM.
    Mild Spastic Diplegia Cerebral Palsy and bad proprioception.
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  5. #4
    Distinguished Community Member agate's Avatar
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    WELCOME, sunny3000!

    I usually am at the MS Forum and am not well informed on the questions you're raising but I just wanted to welcome you.

    And to say that this time in your child's life is critical for speech development. Have you tried to find a specialist in childhood apraxia of speech? This link probably won't help you to find one in your country as it is a US organization but it does describe the disorder and some links there may give you some more information:
    MS, diagnosed 1980. Avonex 2001-2004. Copaxone 2006-2009.

    "Always put off until tomorrow whatever you think you should do today." --Anonymous

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