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We are confident that Bliss is on the Other Side. Sorrow is the sister of Bliss, and it is what we endure on this side. While we rejoice for our loved ones, we mourn for our loss. It's their gain, but it is our loss. And it is painful, because as long as we are Earth-bound, we relate in the physical realm.
I stole this from Rose. She doesn't know yet but I will tell her. It spoke to me, made so much sense, made me so sad. I am sick of sorrow. How do I get rid of that. Does one focus on the Bliss. One grin every day all day because you know what is coming. The Bliss. Well golly are we just supposed to get glimpses of bliss here and there in our lives just to be reminded of what's to come? How do people live their Bliss. I know some do. They are in a state of Bliss no matter what their lives are like. I want that. I have seen it in those that are spiritual and practice and live their faith. I have gotten glimpses but something always comes to stamp out the fire. I still feel the need to go to church. I think I could feel some peace there.

Today I have done everything that I require of myself now when I get up. Jared went and spent the night at his dad's last night so I got to walk to the bathroom naked this morning lol. I really hope he is able to move out on his own within the next two years. His therapist is all for him doing college campus living. Me too.

cookout was not last night is tonight. I was kind of relieved and Jared will get to be here later so he'll miss nothing.

Despite the constant pain I feel as though most of my disability is mental. So I feel like it is not a thing. I have no major visible disability. Unless I am gimping and groaning from the pain lol. Almost as though I am not worthy of being here and everyone is worse off than me so why should I commplain, it could always be worse. That again is my self pity talking. Like I need to feel included, no that's not right, I need to feel .............kripes I can't think of it. Agate my English escapes me

Since today is a holiday Monday and I am alone I am giving myself permission to do whatever the heck I want to do within the confines of my own little world.

some of my best work is running rampant all over the house. Well, living and dining rooms, rest of doors are shut. My animals are out on the patio pissed off. less than a week and they will be gone. keeping them longer than 8 weeks has really been beneficial. I can really see the extra things they learn these last two weeks. Mama just came to me because one of the babies climbed to the top of the screen door and was stuck, she let me know then I heard Chunk crying so i had to go rescue him lolol. Right now they are a small bit of bliss for me.

Bits of Bliss in my own little world.

Working on the yard with my music going full blast.
When I first lay down in bed with a good book.
Getting bills paid.
Completing my new morning routine.
When my library books are delivered, it's like Christmas.
When I go to the doc and see I have lost weight and bloodwork was good.
When I complete a project.
Music. Again.
When Jared is doing good in school.
When I cook a big meal, is a rare occasion.

Updated 09-23-2018 at 07:20 AM by houghchrst

Chris is babbling again.


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